Empathy in the Birth Chart, Part 2

 In Part 1, we defined empathy and saw how, when we are in defensive mode, empathy is not always possible. Concluding that empathy itself can’t be seen in the birth chart, we discussed, with an illuminating case study, how our chart aspects suggest where our empathy-blocking defences can kick in. In Part 2, more signifiers for defence mechanisms in the birth chart…

Saturn aspects suggest defence mechanisms because Saturn tests, blocks and controls. It represents where we have fears and doubts and lack confidence. All of these are fuel for our defences.

With Venus-Saturn, for example, there might be defences against getting hurt in relationships, manifesting in a fear of letting others get too close. The Venus-Saturn person therefore might un-empathetically hurt and reject someone else before it can be done to them. (See Part 1 for a case study example of how a generational Mercury Square Saturn played out).

Lack of empathy can also come through some of the aspects we might think of as easier. Jupiter types, for example, who are confident, upbeat and optimistic, can sometimes lack tolerance and empathy for those who are struggling with low self-esteem or who, for whatever reason, lack the faith, courage and self-belief to pursue their dreams and ambitions.

Aspect patterns are also a good place to look for defences, especially T-Squares, which so often describe the nitty gritty issues in a person’s life. Grand Trines are also associated with defence mechanisms, because they represent where we hesitate to step out of our comfort zone.

If we think about the zodiac signs, Aries types might lack empathy for those who aren’t fast-paced go-getters; Taurus or Libra might disapprove of Aries' need to be numero uno and label them as aggressive or selfish, not understanding the Aries mission to go through life as a warrior. A Gemini type might be unfairly labelled as someone who can’t commit to one thing, with others not getting that Gemini is here to experience variety and needs to keep their options open. And so on, through the signs…

Back to those sensitive Water signs mentioned in Part 1 and why they might not always necessarily be empathetic. It’s because that emotional sensitivity, if it gets too much, can be defended against to protect the Water person from pain and suffering. I recently watched a Netflix show about teen fairies learning to harness their powers. One of them was an empath, who wore headphones constantly to protect herself from becoming overwhelmed by the feelings of others. Sensitive humans can also feel overwhelmed by their empathy at times and that’s when their psychological defences can kick in, which while offering protection, but can also block empathy.

The Cancerian retreating into their shell is a well known astrological symbolism. Cancerians need to feel safe and at home. They are drawn to people who help them to feel comfortable and once they find them, they seek to keep them close. Whether it’s their blood family or the ‘family’ they choose, Cancerians need to feel cushioned by their relationships. However, this can lead to clannish cliques and those who don’t make it into Cancer’s close circle might feel rejected. This is where a defence might make someone else feel the hurt that the defended person is trying to protect themselves from. The hurt doesn’t go away, it’s just passed on.

Scorpio of course has its famous defensive sting. Using that sting to point out others’ flaws, often with merciless honesty, is Scorpio’s way of protecting themselves from such searing scrutiny. Last of all, we have compassionate, empathetic Pisces; but feeling everyone’s emotions as if they are their own can make porous, sensitive Pisces retreat into victim mode. When Pisces feels that nobody’s problems are as bad as theirs, it’s hard for them to feel empathy. Conversely, Pisces, with a genuine desire to stop someone’s suffering, might go into full rescue mode, but if this is done with pity rather than real empathy, the support they offer can feel dis-empowering.

These examples show that while you can’t judge levels of natural empathy from a chart, you can see areas where empathy might potentially be blocked. Astrology can help with self-understanding and the recognition of where we fall into our defences. We all need defences of course, they are very useful, but by becoming more aware of them we can potentially see where they have become unhelpful and where we might be unwittingly hurting others or not recognising when they might need support and compassion and empathy.

Click here for Part 1 - Empathy in the Birth Chart?

Wondering about life post-pandemic?  A consultation can help you clarify what it might look like and better understand your opportunities, stumbling blocks and options.  Details here: Consultations and Other Services  

With love,

Mandi

 

Empathy in the Birth Chart?

I’ve been wondering lately; can the birth chart tell us how empathetic someone is?

Collins Dictionary describes empathy as “the power of understanding and imaginatively entering into another person’s feelings.” In other words, it’s the ability to imagine yourself in someone else’s shoes, regardless of whether or not you have experienced what they are experiencing.

There are different kinds of empathy. Emotional empathy is how we commonly think of empathy, as per the dictionary definition above. There is also cognitive empathy, which is the ability to see things from someone else’s perspective without necessarily feeling their feelings. Then there’s compassionate empathy, which is when empathy is followed through with helpful action.

Emotional empathy is most easily associated with the Water element (Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces), because qualities associated with Water are emotional sensitivity and connection. However, when Water dominates a chart, it doesn’t necessarily guarantee empathetic responses to the feelings of others (I’ll explain in Part 2 why this might be). It’s also not the case that those with a lack of Water in their chart or with a dominance of Fire (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius), Earth (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn) or Air (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius) don’t have as much capacity for empathy, although we might surmise that an Air type is likely to have more cognitive empathy than emotional, for example. However, I’m focusing on emotional empathy here and everyone, whatever the element balance in their chart, has feelings. It’s my experience that most people with any element emphasis or deficit in their chart are capable of this kind of empathy, but are also capable of showing a lack of empathy at times.

So, the question remains, can you determine empathy from the birth chart? I think not and nor, I believe, can you tell if someone lacks empathy from their chart. Lack of empathy/callousness is defined as one of the characteristics of psychopaths and I don’t believe you can spot one just from a chart, any more than you can spot an empath. But let’s assume, for the purposes of this essay, that most people are capable of some degree of empathy and look at the question from a different angle.

I was walking down a residential street this morning (heading for my local park) and got to thinking that perhaps the birth chart can tell us something about what might get in the way of empathy.

As I strolled, in a moment of universal synchronicity, something random happened that made me feel no empathy, followed by a distinct empathetic response just moments later.

Called out of my thinking head by shouting, my automatic conscious response was curiosity. What’s happening, where is this noise coming from? Meanwhile, unconsciously, my brain would have been trying to figure out if this posed any danger to me. So, no empathy here, just my natural, selfish, survival response with a measure of inquisitiveness. I discovered where the noise was coming from when a young woman ran yelling out of an open front door, swiftly followed by two police officers. As she crossed the road and started running directly towards me, the officers still in pursuit, again I felt no empathy. I only feared for my own safety, so moved out of the way pretty sharpish.

Once they’d passed me and I was safe, I again became curious about what was happening. The woman had been caught up by the police who were trying to restrain her. She was terribly upset; crying and begging them to let go of her. Now, witnessing her obvious distress, I felt upset and had the beginnings of tears in my eyes. I didn’t know the background of her situation, whether she’d hurt someone else or herself, or if she was having some sort of breakdown. Nevertheless, I had a fleeting emotional upset in response to this stranger’s anguish. In other words, I could empathise, despite the fact that I didn’t understand what was happening and that thankfully I’ve never myself been chased and restrained by the police. However, it was possible for me to imagine feeling so scared that I would need to run away from capture.

It would have been impossible for me to empathise when I felt I might be in danger in this uncertain situation. My automatic response was to defend myself, to make myself safe, nobody else mattered at that point. So, if it’s impossible to be empathetic when our defences are up (physical or emotional), we can explore how the defence mechanisms suggested by our birth chart, get in the way of, inhibit or delay our emotional empathy.

Where do we see our defences in our chart? A safe bet is that they are suggested by our aspects and aspect patterns. First, what do we mean by defences? Ego defence mechanisms “are psychological processes people use, in order to protect themselves against extreme discomfort and tension. They are also effective in maintaining mental composure and self-esteem in a variety of what might otherwise be very painful situations. Defence mechanisms operate at an unconscious level, and all of us use them occasionally. However, prolonged and persistent use of them is counter-productive, because such defences serve to distort reality and falsify experience.” (Hough, p85).

Square aspects between planets are an obvious candidate for showing potential defence mechanisms in the birth chart. This is because squares often impel us to act, but the tension of the Square means that that action might be the activation of a defence mechanism.  Take, for example, Mercury Square Saturn. This aspect suggests a fear of not being clever enough or a fear of being wrong and usually this fear stems from early life experiences. Perhaps the child was ridiculed or punished when they made a mistake? Perhaps their defence was to give up trying and live with the ‘story’ that they are stupid. Or perhaps they arm themselves with the ‘belief’ that they are right about everything and everyone else is wrong. This might feel like a safe place to sit and in the short term it protects from the threat of further punishment or ridicule. But to be wrong, to make mistakes, to allow ourselves to fail is how we learn and ultimately how we succeed. If someone beats themselves up over failing a test (or even for failing to get top marks in a test), how are they able to show empathy to others who might be struggling on that test and could perhaps use a little support and encouragement? And the subtle message the Mercury-Saturn person gives to others is that they think anyone who gets lower marks than them really is stupid.

A lady with this aspect who, while bright, for socio-economic reasons, was unable to get the education they wanted. Their child, however (also with Mercury Square Saturn) was able to access higher education. Throughout their years at university, the mother constantly denigrated and ridiculed the child’s desire to get educated, telling them they were lazy and a failure for choosing to get a degree over going straight into a job, marriage and children. Because the mother unconsciously felt envious and threatened by their child’s education opportunities and defended themselves accordingly, there was no empathy for the path their child had taken. Unaware for many years that their mother’s response was a defensive one, born of disappointment from their own childhood, the child was also unable to empathise with their mother’s insecurities and ended up feeling like the failure their mother said they were, while at the same time, emotionally disengaging from the mother, thus confirming the mother’s fears that they would lose their child if they got educated. 

This example, shows how, if we become aware of the issues of our challenging aspects, we can also become aware of our defences and ultimately understand what is behind them. When the child (as the well-educated adult they became) understood where their mother was coming from, they were able to forgive, rebuild the relationship, feel proud of their academic achievements and finally share them with the world without fear (or rather feel the fear and do it anyway - old habits die hard).

Part 2 coming soon... more examples of how defences in the birth chart can block empathy.

In the meantime, if  you enjoyed this article... you might also enjoy Jupiter, Saturn and the Superego

Wondering about life post-pandemic?  A consultation with Mandi Lockley can help you clarify what it might look like and better understand your opportunities, stumbling blocks and options.  Details here: Consultations and Other Services  

Reference: Hough, M. (2019) Counselling Skills and Theory. 4th Edition. UK: Hodder Education.

Jupiter, Saturn & The Superego

 

Mercury, Ego and the Inner Journey

We know that astrological Mercury represents mind, thoughts and communication in our horoscope.  The mind is where our sensory perceptions are processed in the brain and our perceptions are reflected in our thoughts. As we think, we rationalize, assess, form judgement, make decisions, learn and solve problems. We also form beliefs, ideas and opinions which we express through our actions and communications. This can take the form of sharing ideas, the transfer of information, negotiations, compromises and arguments and we also use verbal and non-verbal communication to form bonds and friendships with others.

Mercury’s sign, house and aspects tell us a lot about our style of communication; how we think and learn and connect with others. It also represents how we mentally process our opinion of ourselves, our self-image. In this, Mercury becomes the tool for our ego and its condition in our chart shows us how our ego communicates, as well as how we can go beyond our ego. If we take the journey beyond the ego, we are channeling a deeper part of Mercury, remembering that Mercury, or Hermes to use the Greek name, is the messenger of the Gods, the intermediary between the human and divine realms. We are particularly invited to step onto these deeper paths when Mercury is touched by an outer planet by aspect or transit.

But first, let’s define the ego. Sigmund Freud, founder of psychoanalysis, divided the human psyche into the id, the ego and the superego1.

According to Freud, the ego is the self-conscious part of ourselves. It’s how we define ourselves, including our status compared to others and our place in society. It’s wrapped up in our self-esteem, our sense of self-importance and the ‘roles’ we play. Our ego helps us to satisfy our id (the primitive, irrational, instinctive part of the psyche) without breaking society’s rules and conventions. The ego itself is moderated by the superego, which is our conscience, our ‘ideal’ self and the moral values of our collective society.

The ego of course, is reflected in our thoughts, words, opinions and ideas, as well as in conscious decision making and problem solving and this is how Mercury becomes the messenger of the ego. But if Mercury carries the ego, where is the ego itself in the birth chart?

We most strongly associate the Sun with the ego, because it’s about our self-identity and how we reinforce it. The Ascendant is how we project our ego out into the world through our personal style and outward persona. The Moon represents the baggage our ego carries from the past, translated into our moods and habits (it’s also the id, expressed as who we are behind closed doors when nobody’s looking and what we need to feel safe). Venus is about our self-worth, which is also the stuff of the ego and even those things we take pleasure in can be egoic if we use them to boost our self-esteem and status. Mars signifies how we assert ourselves and react to conflict, which is usually ego based. Competing is of the ego because it assumes a winner and a loser. Of course, when we totally lose our temper the ego has given way to the irrational id. When we get to Jupiter and Saturn we are into superego territory, but these planets can also be egoic, in that Jupiter can be about over-confidence and an inflated ego and Saturn about how the ego seeks respect. The fears and doubts associated with Saturn are also often ego based.

Beyond Saturn we’re in the realms of the unconscious, the sphere of the Gods, but more about that as we look at the chart examples.

The relationship of the Sun (the largest and most powerful signifier of our ego) to Mercury (the messenger of the ego) is telling.  Astronomically, Mercury is the closest planet to the Sun and astrologically, they can never be more than 28 degrees apart, meaning that only a Conjunction aspect is possible. This tightly entwines our ego and its emissary.  A primary interpretation of Sun Conjunct Mercury2 is that it suggests an ego driven, perhaps controlling personality, with difficulty separating the ego identity from one’s ideas and opinions, which might manifest as seeing one’s own perspective as the only correct perspective and having difficulty accepting the views of others. More positively, it’s associated with independent thought and confident expression.  But even without the Conjunction, the close proximity of the Sun and Mercury suggests that every one of us is somewhat ego driven and to a greater or lesser extent lacking objectivity and defensive of our own opinions when they clash with another’s.

In the traditional astrology of William Lilly, planets Conjunct the Sun are said to be hidden by the light of the Sun and therefore debilitated, weakened3. This applies to anything in the same sign and within 17 degrees of the Sun, but a planet is in its most serious debility - combust - when between 17 minutes and 8 degrees 30 minutes from the Sun (although a planet within 17 minutes of the Sun is considered strengthened by the Sun). If we were to apply this idea psychologically, we could say that the ego (Sun) overpowers everything that gets too close to it.

The following both have Sun Conjunct Mercury and have both defined and written extensively about the ego.... To read more, including analysis of the charts of Sigmund Freud and Eckhart Tolle, click here to read on astro.com

This article was first published in Constellation News magazine and was re-published at astro.com

Pandemics of Fear

While the spread of Coronavirus is undoubtedly serious and we must all do what we can to keep ourselves and others safe, what we are also in the midst of is a pandemic of fear.

With the Saturn Pluto Conjunction ongoing, the astrology is clear. Saturn and Pluto hard aspects have fear written all over them. They are an astrological archetype of collective fear.

The last Saturn Pluto Conjunction was in 1981-83 in Libra, a sign associated with relationships and sharing. The fear during that Conjunction was the threat of the AIDs and HIV, a virus transmitted mainly through sex and also the sharing of needles during drug taking. Again, this virus was very real and at the time it had the potential to be a death sentence for those who contracted it.

In my world, however, as a young women just starting out on her sexual journey, I was never really at risk. It was all about the fear. I clearly remember the UK government campaign, ‘Don’t Die of Ignorance.’ The visuals – tombstones and funereal bouquets – piled on the scares. This disease, we were told, could take us directly to the bowels of Pluto’s underworld if we didn’t exercise extreme caution (Saturn) when having sex. Protection took the form of the barrier method (Saturn) of contraception. My girlfriends and I had all gone ‘on the pill’ as soon as we were ready to be sexually active. This is what young women did in the early eighties. We were the beneficiaries of the sexual revolution started by our parents’ generation. AIDS ended that. We were all scared. There was also a sense of feeling the fear and doing it anyway (with protection), but we were definitely, especially us women, denied the sexual freedoms we had thought were our right.

So here we are, with a new Saturn Pluto Conjunction, this time in Capricorn and another new, seemingly terrifying virus. Most at risk are the elderly and those with some underlying health conditions, but most particularly elders with underlying conditions. Saturn in Capricorn clearly describes the elderly.

Jupiter, also in Capricorn, amplifies everything. Are we as a society and individuals overreacting, over-exaggerating? Some say yes, some say no, but time will tell. What is clear and again Saturnian, is that we are all looking to Government and other experts, such as health and medical professionals for advice and instruction. In many countries, laws are changing, if even temporarily. Some laws are being relaxed to help flagging economies affected by the virus and other laws are being set to help control the virus’ spread and by implication to control the behaviour of citizens. Law and order come under Saturn’s symbolism and control is a classic Saturnian word.

There’s a sense of being at war and war-like language is being used, which shouldn’t surprise anyone who understand the combined symbolism of Saturn and Pluto.

In the UK, people are panic buying toilet paper (or loo roll, as us Brits like to call it), even though Coronavirus doesn’t apparently cause bowel upsets. Pluto is of course associated with bowels and with waste in general. It’s about what we get rid of once we’ve taken what we need. This applies as much to our bodily functions as it does to our psyches. To purge is also to cleanse and hand sanitising gels are also currently being rationed due to high demand.

People with the virus are being forced to self-isolate. Again, it is typical of Pluto transits to isolate us, as individuals but also collectively. Walk around central London today and you will find that people are keeping each other at a physical distance. Expect a space to clear around you should you cough or sneeze. Usually it’s impossible to walk down the main shopping street near my office without literally brushing up against someone. Now we’re back in the realm of Saturnian boundaries and barriers.

Keep your distance, says Saturn!  By keeping away you are being isolated, says Pluto! ‘Social distancing’ currently looks like becoming one of the phrases of the year.

Yesterday (10^th March), Mercury turned Direct in Aquarius, having spent most of its Retrograde in the sign of its Fall, Pisces. I tend to underplay Mercury Retrograde’s significance and for good reason, but this one was severe. Under Pisces, things can spread, become infected. Because of the fear of spread, we have travel restrictions, cancelled flights, holiday plans ruined, big crowd events cancelled, closed schools, fears about the virus spreading on public transport, massive strains on ‘Piscean’ institutions such as hospitals, prisons and care homes. And let’s not forget all the cruise passengers trapped on board floating germ factories. Of course, on its own, Mercury Retrograde doesn’t symbolise the whole picture, but it’s nevertheless interesting to note the clear symbolic resonances.

Saturn is today at 29 degrees Capricorn. When a planet is in the last degree of any sign, the meanings of the planet and its sign are intensified. The seminal work on this and the other ‘power degrees’ of the zodiac has been done by Frank Clifford who writes that at 29 degrees we “encounter some of the most challenging facets of that meaning.” A four stage plan to tackle the outbreak is in operation in the UK and elsewhere. Stage one is Containment. The second is Delay. Both of these are Saturn key words and these stages are incredibly challenging to implement and to live by. If the UK goes into Delay stage (as it has in Italy and other places) it means not going to work or school, not visiting elderly relatives, not travelling unless it’s an emergency and not socialising. And where this is being enforced there are threats of criminalisation for non-compliance, undoubtedly representing the most challenging aspects of Saturn, at the end of Capricorn.  

And as I publish, the World Health Organisation has just confirmed the Coronavirus as a pandemic.

 

Saturn moves into Aquarius on 22^nd March. We shall see what happens then. It’s the sign of humanitarianism, community, collaboration. It’s also the sign of innovation and technology, which bodes well for the 3^rd stage – Research – which is already underway to develop a vaccine and also find existing drugs that can help with treatment. Reports are that pharma companies are collaborating positively. The Mitigation phase, if all else fails, focuses on saving lives, whilst maintainin public services and law and order. Stay safe, look after each other and don’t panic, this too shall pass.

(Here's a happy picture I took in the park today - spring is on it's way).

With love,

Mandi

The Blogathon Lives On

Astroair Astrology celebrates its 10^th birthday this month and with Mercury currently retrograde, it’s a perfect time to recall past highlights. Today I remember a most exciting and memorable high point!

In 2010 I was thrilled to be invited by the late, great Donna Cunningham (author of many books, but most notably Healing Pluto Problems) to participate in an amazing Blogathon to celebrate International Astrology Day.

It was themed around the Saturn, Uranus, Pluto cardinal T-Square and comprised more than 70 articles from professional astrologers around the world. These articles provided helpful resources and advice to help readers deal with Saturn, Uranus and Pluto issues.

Donna, naturally, edited the Pluto section. Uranus was compiled by CJ Wright, better known as the wonderful Auntie Moon and Astroair Astrology compiled a series of articles about Saturn.

While some of the articles were of their time and others are sadly no longer available, many of them are still live and remain relevant today.

Here’s a selection of the best timeless articles:

Pluto problems have you perplexed? Here's what helps...

From Lawrence Grecco: Dealing with Pluto on the Angles

Pluto and Bullying – How to Recognise and Stop It and What to Tell Astrology Clients about Pluto in Capricorn both by Donna Cunningham and full of helpful resources and advice.

And from The Radical Virgo blog: Sleepless in America, What’s Pluto got to do with it?

Browse the full Pluto section, edited by Donna Cunningham, here

Uranus - claiming a self-reliant future

From the inimitable Steven Forrest: Transiting Uranus through the 12 houses

From the Void, Of Course blog: A Guide for Teens Studying Astrology

CosmiTec discusses break up transits in: When Love is Over - Divorce Horoscopes

From the technology section, Neeti Ray’s advice for astrologers on using social media: Astro Tribes and Connecting in the Age of Aquarius

Browse the full Uranus section, edited by Auntie Moon, here

Look after Saturn and Saturn looks after you...

From Donna Cunningham’s Skywriter blog - Saturn Transits – What do they mean for your Career?

In Tightening Your Belt with Saturn Mandi Lockley looks at Saturn transits to the money houses

Kathy Loveless on using the Emotional Freedom Technique to help with Saturn issues: Tapping for Saturn – Astrology & EFT

Using insightful client case studies, Jessica Shepherd Takes up the Long Conversation with Astrology

Browse the full Saturn section, coordinated by Mandi Lockley here

Planetary Tests

Donna devised a series of very clever tests to assess the strength of the outer planets in your birth chart!  Take the Saturn test here (and scroll down to test the strength of your Uranus, Neptune and Pluto)

Dedication 

Dedicated to Donna Cunningham, one the great astrologers of our time. Although we never met in person, she remained a friend and mentor after the Blogathon was completed. Her work lives on through her books and magazine articles as well as in all the incredible free articles and resources on her Skywriter blog.

And also a huge shout out to CJ Wright (Auntie Moon) from whom I also learnt a lot and who was a fun and supportive colleague on this project. Her website has gone from strength to strength over the years since and is also really beautiful – check it out here

With love,

Mandi xxx

The Big Three for the First Three

I've had a great time (once I got over my camera-shyness) recording short pieces for the Academy of Astrology YouTube channel, along with colleagues Rod Chang, Sue Farebrother and Marcos Patchett.

Our latest series of videos run through each zodiac sign, discussing how their essence and qualities filter through the 'Big Three' - the Ascendant, Moon and Sun.

Here are the first three signs - enjoy!

The Big 3...What's up with Aries? - by Marcos Patchett

Are you a bullish Taurus? By Mandi Lockley

The 2 Faces of Gemini - By Sue Farebrother

You can explore the rest of our YouTube Channel Here